Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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