I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
