i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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