dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
