just come out here and I will go home with you...
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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