Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Randomize
