Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
it's like iHOP with fire
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
