you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
did i just pee glitter
Randomize