google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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