it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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