i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
