Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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