I want to stick my p in your. b.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
me + whiskey = a bad person
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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