he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
