oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
