90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
