Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
