the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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