marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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