I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Randomize
