so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
