ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
