but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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