The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
