I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
