I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
