so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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