The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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