It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
