"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
