Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
