dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
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