I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
