so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Randomize
