I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
