STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
wrigley field is MILF paradise
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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