does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
You were trust falling into bushes
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
