Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize