Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
you had me at cake vodka
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Randomize
