dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
