I want to stick my p in your. b.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
