we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Randomize
