last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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