i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
