It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
