she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Randomize