Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
