it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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