i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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