you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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