whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize